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The Gift of Fear by Gavin De Becker
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Today, I want to give you my number one self-defense tip: Prevent attacks!
Too many people think of self-defense as violently fighting off an attacker. In reality, self-defense starts long before that. Once attacked, you have already lost most of the battle. Once attacked, you have a very large likelihood of getting severely hurt or at least failing to stop the attack.
A person can most effectively stop an attack by avoiding it in the first place. Overall, you have to use common sense and take time to make smart choices to avoid dangerous situation and prevent attacks. For example, do not go out alone at night. Do not go off with people you do not know. Keep your doors locked. Have your keys ready when going to your car in an empty parking lot. Those are just examples.
Women and children have to take personal steps most of all. Unfortunately, they face the most danger when going out. Most rapists and abductors target them.
Many self-defense classes will teach you ways to avoid dangerous situations and prevent attacks. Even most martial arts classes make it a point to teach students to avoid fights and avoid the need to fight. So you probably want to take any of those types of classes if you get the chance.
If you have any tips of your own, please post them as a comment. Then the other readers can see them, and we can all share our knowledge.
What do you think?
While we often think of protecting our assets while alive, many people do not think to make arrangements for their estate. In the lack of a formal plan, the government decides what to do with your estate and it may not pass onto your family as you would want it. If you can afford it, you may want to get the help from estate planning attorneys. Morristrust.com offers Arizona asset protection. They also do seminars and have published books available on their website.
If you do not live in Arizona, you probably need an attorney in your own state, because laws vary from state to state.
You want to plan out your estate in a legally formal way especially if you have a big estate. The more valuable your estate, the more people will want to take advantage of poor planning to take your money and stop it from going to what or to whom you want it to go.
What do you think?
If you decide to take a self-defense class, you will need to find one. Let me suggest some places to find local self-defense classes.
A local YMCA or YWCA may offer self-defense classes. Give your local one a call.
Colleges often have self-defense classes. They may offer some only to students, though. Community colleges often host many different classes for the public.
You probably have many martial arts schools in your area. Even if you do not want to learn a martial art, many of these places also have generic self-defense classes or sessions.
You can look on craigslist.com. You can read and post local classified ads and listings for free on craigslist.
Do you have any suggestions of ways to find local self-defense classes? If so, please use the comment function to post them here.
What do you think?
How much do you think getting to know your neighbors will prevent local victimization? How much safer will it make your neighborhood? I think a lot.
Probably due mostly to our fast-paced culture, nowadays people keep mostly to themselves. We spend our time rotting lonely in front of TV screens rather than chatting with our neighbors.
I think if the people in a neighborhood get to know each other better, they will be more able and willing to protect each other. For example, you’ll know and care more if something unusual happens at your neighbor’s house if you know your neighbor.
When people do not know each other well and do not communicate much, it become very hard to spot trouble.
What do you you think?
Preventable violence plagues our society; it includes rape, murder, assault, robbery. Most of us say we want to end victimization and protect innocent people, but we don’t find time for it; but we find time for our favorite TV show or video game. You can do the following to help put an end to victimization and violent crime:
1. Write to people in power (e.g. congressmen, influential businesspersons) and express your concerns about victimization.
2. Organize a local group of interested people into an action team, and discuss local ways to raise awareness and reduce victimization.
3. Always report observed instances of victimization to the proper authorities.
4. Make sure women and children do not have to walk alone at night, or otherwise stay somewhere unsafe alone (e.g. in a car in a bad neighborhood, or at a wild house party full of strangers, etc.)
5. Of course, you can always donate to non-profit organization in the anti-victimization field, such as a battered women’s shelter or a rape victims’ advocacy group. You can donate your money or you can donate your time as a volunteer.
What do you think? Feel free to use the comment function to suggest other ways for individual people to help fight victimization.
Hundreds of thousands of children get mistreated each year by an adult with alcohol problems.
Alcohol diminishes judgment and causes people to lose self-control. That can lead to violence. It can cause an already violent or abusive person to become more violent or abusive, or it can cause a generally non-violent and non-abusive person to become violent or abusive.
Personally, I have found that most people who take alcohol do not become violent. In fact, most of them become nicer and more relaxed and social. However, some people get violent when they drink. I have noticed that alcohol often has the same effects on the same person almost every time they drink. In other words, a person who gets angry, confrontational, and/or violent when they drink will usually get angry, confrontational, and/or violent every time they get drunk.
To make matters worse, violent and angry people tend to drink alcohol more than less angry people.
If you notice that someone you know has a problem with alcohol and a risk of violence, you want to do something. If you know them well enough, you may want to explain your concerns and suggest that they reduce or eliminate their alcohol intake. Beyond that, you can talk to others and try to organize an intervention. Doing this when the person first becomes confrontational while drunk may allow the person to address the issue before it becomes a major problem. For example, you can help a confrontational drunk before he becomes a physically abusive drunk.
Of course, if an alcoholic physically hurts anybody, then contact the proper authorities, especially in the case of domestic abuse.
Many issues worry me. For one, I know that many women, especially single mothers, have to walk to and from work, or to and from the bus stops to get to work. Many of these women cannot afford cars of their own. Sometimes they work long hours and have to walk home after dark and even in the middle of the night.
That poses great risk. Of course, the women know it, but have little choice since they need to support themselves and often time support their family.
As a society, we can try to help by reducing poverty and single-parenting. Individually, we can help by offering to ride them or walk them to work. If you know a woman has to walk around alone at night, offer to walk with her.
What do you think?
Sgt. Graham Dunne from the Aurora Police Department teaches a class that helps people learn what to do in dangerous situations. He gave some important tips to 9news.com.
I include one of the tips:
If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, always run!
Police officers only make 4 of 10 shots when they are in range of 3-9 feet. This is due to stress. The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times. And even then, it most likely will not be a vital organ. Run! Nine out of 10 people who are shot live.
I think many people freeze up out of fear when involved in threatening situations. Fear causes people to act irrationally. You may have trouble making yourself run away from a gun bearing predator who may shoot at you. However, after reading those statistics, I agree with the recommendation to run away if you can.
If the predator will shoot you just because you ran away, think what the predator would do if you let him capture you.
What do you think?
Lindsay Veremis recently wrote about safety tips to decrease risk of abduction. I include an excerpt:
When it comes to reducing your risk of abduction, police officers say say the most important thing is prevention.
Decreasing your risk with common sense practices like traveling in pairs at night, or letting someone know where you’re going if you plan on traveling alone.
[…]
Defense experts say protection starts with your demeanor, many aggressors will back off if you maintain eye contact and walk with confidence. But, if they do attack, experts say you shouldn’t stay and fight, do everything you can to get away.
“A lot of the self defense techniques that you learn are the release and run techniques so there’s really no glory in standing and fighting against somebody that’s trying to attack you,” Thyssen said.
I guess “defense experts” mean, train to use self-defense moves that will incapacitate an attacker long enough and effectively enough for you to run away to safety. I agree with that. Don’t make your end goal to cause the attacker paid, get revenge or so forth. Make your end goal to get away ; make everything you do a means to that end.
What do you think?
49 News reported on self-defense tips from police:
Chuck Haggard and Kristen Hren with the Defensive Tactic Department of the Topeka Police Department visited with 49 News about ways to keep from being attacked.
Situation awareness is key, Haggard said.
“One of the most important things is having your attention where it needs to be,” he said. “A lot of times when one is walking through a parking lot your distracted by your cell phone, you’re doing something else.”
Those activities sends a body language message to a perpetrator that you are not paying attention to your environment, which would make you an easier victim, he said.
The correct approach is to walk assertively by scanning your surroundings and having your keys ready.
“That’s going to send body language that you’re prepared, you’re looking out for yourself,” he said.
Haggard said some people can be too polite, which can lead to dangerous situations.
“If you offend a guy by not getting on an elevator, then so be it,” he said. “You don’t want to polite yourself into being a victim.”
There’s also a video that shows some defense moves for actual physical defense.
What do you think?
Jennifer Chancellor interviews Tracie Crocker about self-defense:
“There’s a lot of confusion and nonsense information out there. The most important tip to share with anyone, anywhere is to pay attention to your surroundings,” said Crocker, who’s worked for the Tulsa Police Department for 19 years, and has been teaching safety classes to women and children in the Tulsa area for 12 years.
She’s interviewed countless victims for the police department and participated in victimology studies, too, she said.
“I get asked over and over again for tips about preventing purse snatchings, rapes, assaults and abductions,” she said. “In this line of work, I’ve heard and seen just about everything.”
Other than paying attention to surroundings, the second most important tip Crocker shares in her workshops is: “Be prepared.”
“There is no race, gender or economic criteria to determine who will be a victim,” she said. “Be prepared to fight if you want to fight. Be prepared to run if you choose to run.
“Think about when you’re vulnerable — walking to work, running at night, being alone at night — and make plans now about what you would do when a ‘worst case’ scenario.
Follow the link above, because the article has a quick 10-question quiz to test your safety and self-defense knowledge.
What do you think?
